A girl can be assigned many versions of who she is before she has had the chance to know who she truly is herself. Some versions come from people who love her. Others come from a careless remark, an expectation she never agreed to, or the feeling that she must change something about herself to be accepted.
Those voices can become so familiar that she stops noticing them. I’m too loud. I’m not clever enough. Girls like me don’t get to the top. She may begin to make choices around those thoughts without ever asking whether they are true.
Knowing yourself takes more than listing your strengths. It means paying attention to what you feel, what matters to you, how you react, and whose opinions you have allowed to shape your view of yourself. Self-awareness gives a girl room to ask: Is this what I believe, or what I have been led to believe?
For a girl of African heritage, family, culture and community may be sources of pride and belonging. She may also have to work through expectations or judgements that do not leave enough room for the person she is becoming. Life skills help her do that thinking for herself, with respect for where she comes from and honesty about where she wants to go.
UNICEF includes identity, self-esteem and personal awareness among the abilities adolescents can develop; it also recognises that young people need to explore the influences on how they see themselves. (UNICEF Adolescent kit)
Becoming yourself does not mean having everything worked out. It means learning to recognise your own life while it is being shaped.